Eighteen people gathered at St Andrew’s Church, Short Street, Waterloo on Saturday 2nd March 2024 for ‘Life in all its Fullness’ an event organised by Changing Attitude England held. It was advertised as a “gathering for progressive, inclusive, catholic, evangelical, contemplative, holistic, hopeful, maybe-Christians seeking transformation and justice within God’s unconditional, infinite, intimate love.” Some people had come long distances – Southend (not so far), Poole, Bristol. In the days before the event seven people who had booked emailed to say they were unable to come after all. I said that I would write and post a blog reflecting on the meeting. It has taken me a long time to do this. The nine hour journey home on Monday exhausted me, trains delayed thanks to a derailment at Woking.
We gathered in a circle and after a brief introduction to the day, we went round the circle introducing ourselves. Some had been members of the original Changing Attitude network, some had little or no knowledge of Changing Attitude but had been attracted by the title ‘Life in all its fullness’. It became apparent that we were a very diverse group. Colin led the group in a breathing exercise to centre in our bodies. John reprised the conversation five of us had in Robert’s garden. We divided into three groups of six to allow time for more personal conversations about ourselves and our experience of God. We gathered briefly for a plenary before lunch.
The morning had gone well; the afternoon was less satisfactory. The organisers should have met at lunch time to review what we planned for the afternoon but didn’t. We spent the whole afternoon in a large circle, which wasn’t our original intention. Tina made notes of some of the ideas expressed and I’ve added a few notes of my own. These brief notes show how diverse our conversation was:
A call to authenticity based around Jesus' actions, the pattern that he sets especially in relationships
Jesus as 'the pioneer and perfecter of our faith' (Hebrews 12:2).
Jesus as the model in his relationships, energy, teaching and that we are invited to be model in the same way.
The role of the second commandment to love one another 'as I have loved you'; the working out of that in terms of acceptance and what it is that Jesus wants of me.
The role of the first commandment, To love God with all our heart, and soul, and mind, and strength; the more we can love God the more we can love other people and ourselves.
This last point, about loving ourselves, prompted Colin to say that the missing element for him was that the Church had never allowed him, as a gay man, to see God in his own self; the importance of seeing God in you; the Incarnation continues in you.
Jesus did not interpret the Law legalistically but in terms of love.
'They all heard them speaking [the gospel] in their own languages' (Acts 2:6): 'we are not the authors of our own acceptance; the expression of that love is founded in our acceptance of one another.'
The madness of othering/apartheid.
The role of fear; Loving without fear, fear of the unknown/other.
Jesus was transgressive against human rules.
The limitations of being human had led to the corruption of 'the rules': we had screwed up rules that were based in love.
Jesus challenged a corrupt elite.
Acceptance as an expression of love.
Today God is too often treated as a marketing product.
People are living embodied by fragile, ambiguous lives.
We need to be present if we are to find an emotional, mystical way through to awareness of God.
The Church as an institution has not grasped the implications of death and resurrection.
The creation of the new network, ‘Together’, announced at General Synod at the beginning of the week, an amalgamation GSGSG and MOSAIC (of which CAE is in theory a member), was on some people’s minds. People wanted to know more about what was going on. Helen was able to provide insight.
My reflections
I’ve spent the days since the meeting reflecting on what I’d hoped it might achieve – and didn’t, for me. There isn’t a simple, unity of ideas among those drawn to an event exploring something as all-embracing as life in all its fullness. What did Jesus mean by this?
What the ‘system of Christianity’, the Institutional Church and we individual Christians find it hard to recognise and become aware of, let alone come to terms with, is that much traditional, orthodox Christian teaching and practice is unhealthy – systemically unhealthy and abusive – directly contrary to the life, teaching, example and practice of Jesus, even though it is justified by (and in some ways validated by) reference to scripture, tradition and reason.
The normalisation of much unhealthy, abusive, traditional, orthodox Christian theology and teaching makes it more difficult to look at the Gospel records and formulate a healthy essence of Jesus’ life and teaching because unhealthy ideas and practices are normalised and dominate Christian consciousness. This normalisation means it is difficult at an event like ‘Life in all its fullness’ to maintain a conversation between eighteen people that easily finds common themes and threads.
This creates a big problem for me and a big problem for everyone pursuing in multiple different ways a Christian Vision and theology that exemplifies justice and inclusion based on a belief in God as unconditional, infinite, intimate love. I have confidence in my own vision and Christian faith. My foundations were laid seventy years ago at St Barnabas Southfields and in the diocese of Southwark, fifty years ago in the Basingstoke team ministry, forty-five years ago at Westcott House, forty years ago at St George’s Camberwell and St Faith’s Wandsworth, back in Southwark Diocese. These experiences laid healthy, deep, Christian foundations.
I am now living, we are now living, at a time when Christianity and the Christian Church continues to maintain an often primitive, pre-scientific, pre-evolutionary, pre-cosmic, immature, infantile theology with naive concepts of God and reality, a simplistic, fundamentalist, historically ignorant understanding of the Bible and a superficial interpretation of Jesus’ life and teaching.
At the end of the meeting I felt dejected. I am not a natural event organiser, my short term memory is bad, and my mind was distracted.
Sunday Mass
On Sunday morning I took a bus to St John the Evangelist Upper Norwood for their 10.30 High Mass. The building, by J.L. Pearson, is stunning. The worship and liturgy was beautifully crafted, coffee and cake afterwards sumptuous. But missing for me was an awareness of how worship can be and needs to be relational and inclusive in practice, modelling in choreography our real presence and God’s real presence. This awareness was first planted in me by a curate in Southfields sixty years ago. It was a model that forty years ago underpinned the way we worshipped at St Faith’s Wandsworth. Clive Larsen, a trustee in the past of Changing Attitude, intuitively created the same model of deeply, physically, personally inclusive worship at St Agnes, North Reddish, south of Manchester.
Our souls and bodies
I’m a contemplative, mystical activist. It’s hard to explain, from a spiritual reflective, contemplative, mystical, body-centred, incarnational, relational, evolutionary, dynamic, inclusive, creation-centred, cosmic Jesus-centred, theologically radical, visionary perspective, in a simple way, what the essence of my vision of God is. It comes through time and direct experience. It is not easily found today, though its presence is universal and ubiquitous – because God IS.
What next?
At the end of the event at St Andrew’s, there was conversation about a next meeting, possibly in August or September. I need time to process, time to reflect, time to restore energy and confidence. My life is vulnerable at the moment. I’m exploring the possibility of moving to London, leaving behind a meditation space that brings sunrises and sunsets to inspire and centre me and a garden railway to distract me, but life here is too lonely.
There is so much work for Changing Attitude England to do in the realms of spiritually, sexuality, gender, race, theology, liturgy, safeguarding, prejudice and abuse. The first fundamental objective of the newly-formed network between the General Synod Gender and Sexuality Group and ‘Together’ is to “unite those seeking to remove all discrimination in the Church of England, especially where it is embodied in the formal and legal structures of the Church. I’m hoping CAE will be included in this new Coalition. As for the Church of England, the Living in Love and Faith process has done good work but has yet to confront the challenges it has to face if the Church is to become a safer, holier, more Christ-like body.
Changing Attitude England is active in the context of the Church of England and the future of Christian faith in a world that is becoming increasingly polarised on a planet in crisis, climatic, ecological, political, social, economic, emotional and relational.
Changing Attitude England works in the context of an always evolving faith in God, ‘True God’ and in the essence of Jesus’ life and teaching. These are questions we didn’t really get to grips with at the event. Our thoughts are so diverse and progressive ideas sketchily held in today’s Church. This is largely why I felt dejected at the end of the day. My vision and ambition is always huge – arrogant even – against a reality that is complex and fragile.
The membership of the College of Bishops and General Synod is not particularly propitious today if what we believe in is the creation of a spiritually and emotionally theologically healthy, inclusive, reflective Church.
Changing Attitude England will continue to pursue its vision of a God of unconditional, infinite, intimate love and of Jesus who says “I have come that you may have life, life in all its fullness” (John 10.10); of the Archbishops’ commitment to “a radical new Christian inclusion”. The Church of England’s focus must be turned towards nurturing the essence of God’s unconditional, cosmic love in the hearts, bodies, minds and souls of all human beings. This is Jesus’ message, the truth of creation revealed in the Gospels, embodying a God of compassion, empathy, and unconditional Christian, universal love.